In this episode Dr. Nanika Coor celebrates Disability Pride Month, diving into what it can truly mean for your family. Discover practical ways to unlearn old narratives about disability, embrace every unique mind and body, and become a co-conspirator in building a truly inclusive world starting at home. This episode will help you foster deeper connection, understanding, and liberation for all.
In this episode Dr. Nanika Coor celebrates Disability Pride Month, diving into what it can truly mean for your family. Discover practical ways to unlearn old narratives about disability, embrace every unique mind and body, and become a co-conspirator in building a truly inclusive world starting at home. This episode will help you foster deeper connection, understanding, and liberation for all.
Sources: https://thenoraproject.ngo/
Transcript: https://project-parenthood.simplecast.com/episodes/disability-pride-parenting-for-a-fully-inclusive-world/transcript
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What if what you learned about "normal" was actually limiting your child's potential? What if everything you thought you knew about a child's worth, and even your own, was built on an invisible foundation? In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain. Not just physical ones, but the ones in your mind that might keep you from seeing the full, vibrant spectrum of human brilliance in your child and others. Get ready to unlearn, to embrace, and to truly liberate your family’s understanding of belonging.
Welcome back to Project Parenthood. I’m your host, Dr. Nanika Coor, clinical psychologist and respectful parenting therapist. This is a space not only for parenting tips, but also an invitation into the layered, liberating process of becoming—to deepen your connection with your child while healing, unlearning, and reshaping what’s possible - in community. Welcome.
As you settle in, I want to invite you to take an intentional moment of pause. Take notice of your breath, feel where your body meets the ground or whatever you’re sitting on. Just observe what’s present for you right now – any sensations, thoughts, or emotions. Notice whatever’s here right now, without judgment.
You carry a lot as a parent or a caregiver or just as a human being navigating a world that’s constantly demanding that you conform. If you’re listening today hoping to get tips for showing up more connected and compassionately with kids, and you have a deep longing to raise children who truly belong, and want them to understand their inherent worth and the value of every other being - you’re in the right place.
Today, I’m highlighting Disability Pride Month, celebrated in July here in the States. This is a time to recognize disability not as a deficit, but as a vibrant, and natural aspect of human diversity – a rich thread in the tapestry of our collective humanity. Let me tell you from the outset, I won’t be talking about "fixing" your kids, or anyone else. I will talk about the journey of unlearning old narratives, listening deeply to lived experiences, and becoming the truly inclusive grown-ups kids need to thrive in a world that values every mind, every body, and every way of being.
As I share these ideas, I invite you to pay attention to what resonates within you – any shifts in your body, any images, memories or ideas that bubble to the surface.
Let’s get into it.
So what is Disability Pride Month? It began as a single day of celebration in Boston, MA in July 1990 - the same year the landmark Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) was signed into law. This act prohibited discrimination against people with disabilities and increased access to more opportunities, the ability to participate more fully in society, and move through the world with greater ease and dignity.
Before the ADA, disabled people faced legal discrimination and physical barriers in nearly every part of life - jobs, schools, transportation, and public spaces were often out of reach.
The first month-long Disability Pride Month took place in July 2015, marking the 25th anniversary of the ADA. Since then, it's become a time for disabled individuals to embrace their identities, reject internalized shame, and be visibly and proudly themselves.
For non-disabled folks, it's a chance to remember that disability is a natural, valuable facet of human diversity - not something to pity, fear, or fix. How much stronger could we be as a society if we spent more time honoring all the ways people move through the world?
Respectful parenting is about seeing your child as whole and worthy of compassion and attunement - whether or not they speak, sit still, make eye contact, or meet dominant-culture norms. Disability Pride Month invites you to take that belief deeper.
What if you were to stop linking respect to performance, obedience, or "normal" development. Every child is worthy of respect simply because they exist. It’s possible to affirm neurodivergence and disability as valid identities, rather than something shameful to "overcome." Here are some ways to do that:
Try Using Inclusive Language. Swap words like “normal” for “non-disabled” or “common.” Describe behavior with curiosity: “They seem to need movement,” instead of “They won’t sit still.”
Try Offering Unconditional Respect. Let go of the idea that your child must earn your respect by conforming. Dignity and worth are inherent for your child and every child, regardless of their neurotype, physical ability, or health status.
Try Challenging Internalized Norms. Reflect on how you may have linked worthiness to ability. This kind of unlearning is a profound and lifelong journey without a specific destination - but Disability Pride Month can be a meaningful start.
Many of us grew up in a world that equated ability with value. Even with the best intentions, this message can pressure kids to "perform" their humanity in socially approved ways. Disability Pride Month challenges you to disrupt that - starting at home.
Try Reframing “Unwanted” Behavior. When your child’s behavior feels “off-track,” pause. Ask, “What are they telling me through this?” Behavior is often communication - of a need, a boundary, or a sensory experience. Your role isn’t to control but to connect.
Try Prioritizing Accessibility. Go beyond compliance. Create environments - at home and beyond - that support emotional regulation, sensory needs, and cognitive accessibility. Whether it’s a quiet corner, clearer communication, or a more flexible routine - these aren’t just “accommodations.” They’re ways of honoring your child’s right to thrive.
Affirming Identity And Modeling Inclusion
What if your child’s neurotype or disability was seen not as a limitation, but as a language - a rich and unique way of being in the world?
Try Affirming Identity, Not Just Accommodating. Kids can tell when they’re being managed vs. celebrated. Mirror their preferred language - like “I’m autistic” instead of “has autism” - and co-create routines, supports, and goals with them. Help them define what thriving means for them.
Try Becoming Co-Conspirators. Allyship begins at home. Normalize disability in your everyday life. Bring in books, media, and toys that reflect disabled joy and leadership. When questions come up, meet them with openness and curiosity.
Moving from ally to co-conspirator means taking action. Attend disability pride events. Speak up for inclusive playgrounds. Seek out disabled creators and educators. When you raise a child in a home that values equity, accessibility, and collective care, you’re raising a child who understands shared humanity - and how to stand in solidarity.
Reflection
As I wrap up today’s episode, I want to invite you to mindfully attend to your body and notice what happens, all by itself, when you hear me say [long pause]: "All bodies are good bodies. All minds are good minds." [long pause] What, if anything, did you just notice? What images, memories, thoughts, or questions arose as I offered these words, or as I’ve been exploring Disability Pride and anti-ableist parenting? Perhaps there were particular body sensations or emotions that came to the surface. Simply notice them, without needing to change or judge them. Just notice what you’re walking away from this episode feeling, thinking or needing.
Anti-ableist parenting isn’t about perfection, you just need to be present, consistently practice, and stay in partnership with your child. You might start with one small shift today. Maybe it’s a change in your language or slowing down enough to really listen to your child’s unique way of communicating. Maybe it’s an apology or attempt at repair if you've misstepped along the way. Whatever it is, just take that one step.
And please simply continue to learn, listen and celebrate the vast and beautiful tapestry of human experience, because that’s what really contributes to a more accessible, inclusive, and truly compassionate world for everyone.
I hope you found this helpful. I’m so curious to know what you listeners want to learn about, what parenting questions are keeping you up at night and what struggles are feeling overwhelming. Also tell me who you might want me to interview on the show. Share your thoughts with me via Instagram @bkparents, send an email to parenthood@quickanddirtytips.com or leave a voicemail at 646-926-3243. For me, this show is about community, collaboration and collective care. So if you’re feeling inspired - follow your impulse to connect with me! And I’ll catch you next week.
Current Pre-recorded Outro:
Project Parenthood is a Quick and Dirty Tips podcast. Our audio-engineer for the show is Dan Feierabend. Our director of podcasts is Holly Hutchings. Our advertising operations specialist is Morgan Christianson and our marketing contractor is Nathaniel Hoopes.